Wedding, Grayson and a French Bulldog!

Hey!

Well, what a whirlwind it has been. Once again, I am sorry I have been non existent.

First off, me and Dan got married! Finally! and it was the most amazing, magical day. It was everything and more. I will share a few pictures later.

We are only really finding our feet again from it all, it was such a build up and lots of stress but we still need to find some downtime to reflect on it all. We still need to choose our photos from our photographer.

We then came home and decide to re-home a 9 month old french bulldog called Albie. Oh my god, what an adventure that has been. He is such a beautiful, loving little dog and Travis and him adore each other, but oh it’s been hard work. It’s like he doesn’t know how to be a dog, how to be affectionate or how to cuddle. We are really trying to work with him and get some training put in place but it is hard with another dog and two kids!

There have been times I thought I regretted my decision to take him on, but, I know he was meant for us. Our little crazy family.

In other news, it’s half term. This is our last week, both boys had two weeks off. We have had such a lovely time, as much as they drive me absolutely insane I am going to miss them when they go back on Monday but I am looking forward to having my routine back.

 

Grayson has been testing this last week. I think he misses nursery, he needs it. He needs the stimulation that I just can’t give him. He is so much different to Kellan, they are both so loving, the most loving and caring little boys I know but my god he has such a temper on him. He shouts at me, growls at me, hits me. It seems however I punish him nothing stops him. He just laughs at me. He doesn’t do it to his Dad, i just know it’s for my benefit which is frustrating. He cries if i leave and he doesn’t see me but if I’m at home with him he turns into a completely different child. I might start calling him Jekyll and Hyde. Seriously.

I am not sure if it is just him being a ‘threeager’ but bloody hell.. he is unbelievable and so exhausting. If you have any tips, please comment or message me because I feel like he has aged me about twenty years, god knows what he will be like when he is actually a teenager.

Anyway, I hope you are all ok and I hope you all have a lovely weekend, we have a fair bit to do tomorrow then hopefully Sunday we can just chill and have some family time before the madness of school starts.

 

I’ve missed my blog, but I am back now. For good. I promise X

 

 

 

Pass me the wine..

do you know when you are having a really shitty day? well today that is me.

The day started off fine, I went about my usual business, dropped the kids to school and nursery then pottered.

Came home, done my housework, cracked on with my work and then decided to pay G’s nursery fee’s – I re-opened the email I originally opened in Spain and checked the price again, this time it was £180 more than I remembered. I was so excited when I first opened it that I didn’t realise in my pure post wedding bubble that there was a page 2.

Fuck. My. Life.

So that set me off in a bad mood, I wanted to write but my work system was being a dick so something that should have taken an hour took two hours. By the time I was finished it was time to pick the sprogs up from school. My brother and his might as well be wife came with me which was nice. I stood in the line for K but he didn’t appear, my heart started racing, my mind flicking through different thoughts ‘shit, did i actually witness him walking into his classroom’ ‘fuck, did i actually drop him off at all today?’ then there he was, mr laid back and all the time in the world looking a right scruff. Nothing was in his backpack, but, he does always come out with his beaming smile.

Now, K has only been in he’s new class for 4 days, 4 days for a just 5 year old in year one is a bit much, but i thought i would ask he’s teacher how he is getting on.

He needs to knuckle down. He doesn’t listen. He is not interested.

That pissed me off even more. I wasn’t pissed off with the teacher, i was just pissed off at the whole thing. He then came home and seemed to have the devil in him (over tiredness at it’s best) he stood on the dogs back, strike one: straight to bed.

fifteen minutes later he came down, he was calm and quiet. Fab. He apologised to the dog and me.

K isn’t a naughty kid, I know most parents say this, but he isn’t. He doesn’t listen, granted. But he isn’t a bad kid. So to have him in the mood he has been in and the constant back chatting – i’ll be honest, my patience has wore thin.

Dan came home and could see I was in one of them moods, he came in and gave me a kiss and a cuddle while taking my wine out of my hand and asked me not to be down and to go back to my happy self. It doesn’t help I have wedding blues, I didn’t want to go back to normality, I liked us being in our bubble.

He gave me a kiss and asked me if I wanted him to bath or shower the boys and put them to bed. Honestly, something so little was like music to my ears. I am so lucky to have him, he is a saint and he know’s how to calm me down.

He has had a stern chat with K about he’s behaviour at school so hopefully it has sunk in. Little pickle.

Sorry, this is a rant post but i have just had a bloody shit day.

Anyway, kids are a bed, dinner is cooking and we are going to chill and watch a film, that’s if Dan doesn’t get sucked into Ozark on Netflix.

Tomorrow is a new day, all of this is sent to test us.

 

 

Caesarean over natural?

well hello, it’s been a while.

I’ll be honest we have been super busy. What with the six weeks holiday, our month in Spain, writing a book oh, and getting married.

We are finally settling back into our routine and the swing of everything. K has just started year one, and G is in he’s second year of nursery.


 

Now, blog topic. This topic comes up quite a lot.

I don’t understand how people think a c-section is an easy way out, or, if they had a choice of section and natural a section would win all day long.

These people have never had sections. Now, i am eternally grateful that my two boys were bought into the world safely, and yes, by caesarean. K was an emergency after 39.5 hours of labour, G was planned as per my consultant.

These are some of the things I get told why a section is better than natural:

  1. your vagina stays the same

in my case, false. My vagina definitely isn’t the same. I laboured with K for hours, they tried every method to get that chunk out which also resulted in being cut and stitched down below. double whammy. 

2. you don’t piss yourself while jumping on a trampoline

that is true, in my case. I may dribble sometimes when i laugh, but i don’t piss myself. 

3. you can poo after c-section without any issues

nope. both times i had to take lactulose because I couldn’t poo, it’s not just vaginal births that have this. 

4. at least you can rest while everyone runs around for you

Oh yea, it’s fantastic being laid up for a few days/weeks because you have had major surgery which entails them cutting through layers of skin while they try not to cut your bladder/bowl or catch your baby. 

 

you get the jist right? yes, in someway it might seem the ‘easy way out’ but i would have loved to have had a natural birth but i didn’t, it is what it is. Just I was having a conversation on holiday about Natural VS. Section and it just angers me on people’s perspectives. I haven’t been through natural, they haven’t been through sections, we can only have our opinions.

 

Anyway.. I hope you are all ok.

I promise it won’t be so long next time

 

A x

 

Just a Quick Hi

Hey lovelys,

Just a little blog to say Hi !!

I’ve been quiet as I have been in Spain and didn’t take my laptop!! I knew if I took it, i would if ended up doing work and I wanted to spend time with the boys – plus I had lots of wedding stuff to sort!

Kids are back to school this week, Grayson is off Nursery today so we went to soft play. He has now crashed on the sofa and I’m watching Friends. Standard.

Will blog later tonight about our holiday and about my worries about Kellan starting year one. It really is creeping up on us !

Oh, for you book lovers out there, I read this book while I was in Spain and I loved it !! Very easy read and great for holidays !!

Link is below

Weight..

I don’t know if you remember me blogging about my nurse appointment and being told that my BMI was in the ‘overweight’ section? 

Well, today I had to go back to get another three months worth of my pill. She told me that I wasn’t just in the overweight section last time, I was in the obese section! I think she could tell by the look on my face that I was gobsmacked, she then went on to tell me that she didn’t want me getting depressed about it and that I have lost some weight so I’m now just in the ‘overweight’ section. She then went on to tell me that she could give me some information on a weight loss programme and I would get the first 12 weeks free.. what the actual fuck. 
I came out of there bummed. No wonder women feel so insecure and constantly worried about their image and weight. I am a size 12-14 – I really wouldn’t class myself as overweight. I eat healthy (most of the time), I am on the go constantly. 
I just don’t get it, I don’t get how they can class you as overweight because some numbers don’t match up. It really bothered me, which has now made me see my body in a different way, the unconfident me came back. I will get over it and I will continue my healthy eating journey, but it just really pissed me off.
I saw something today that said that New Look have started charging a ‘fat tax’ what the hell is wrong with this world, women are meant to be curvaceous, not sticks! I just think it is so wrong how body image is seen at the moment, it makes me worry about my boys and how they will grow up. Everyone is beautiful, what ever shape or size, we are beautiful. 
I hope you are all ok, might sit and indulge in an easter egg now.. why not?

Consent to change your child’s nappy..

Ok, sorry, but what the actual fuck is this ‘expert’ going on about?? A baby needs to give consent for you to change their nappies?!

Mummy: ‘Oh, Hi little newborn baby, can mummy change your nappy? you seem to have had a poo explosion’

Newborn: ‘No, I would like to roll around in my own poo’

Mummy: ‘Ok then, have fun kid’


 

Like seriously?!? come on, what the bloody hell is going on. I’m all for moving with the times and that, but this is just ridiculous, even worse than celebrities branding their children as ‘it’s’ as they don’t want to confuse them into what gender they are!!!

Do you agree with this? I am still gobsmacked by the stupidity of it if I’m honest

 

Let me know your thoughts

A x

Let me fill you in…

First off, let me apologise for the lack of blogs… honestly, I haven’t known my arse from my elbow. What with getting back into the swing of school, birthdays and illnesses it has been one thing after another.

Grayson has tonsillitis, he got antibiotics for it yesterday on his birthday. Two out of he’s three birthday’s he has had it, poor little love. I felt so sad for him yesterday, we didn’t go to the zoo like we planned, we popped to the airport to watch the planes for an hour but he just wanted to come home. To top it off, Kellan is unwell with a cough and temperature, so he was home today.

It has been a long day. I wouldn’t send my kids in ill, but bloody hell. I am exhausted. My house looks like a fucking tip, physically cannot keep on top of it with them two around. Not quite sure how I managed to do it when they were both home !

I will bring you upto speed with whats been happening in my quiet time:

  1. I’ve written a book. An actual book. I am going to be self publishing and I am just in the last stages of that. I think it is referred to as a ChicLit with a bit of naughtiness.
  2. I get married in three months and we are no closer to knowing what is actually going on as the woman we deal with doesn’t seem to have a urgent bone in her body. Myself and the wedding planner are getting extremely cheesed off.
  3. I done a interview for an irish radio station about one of my blogs (yes, it was a few months ago) (yes, i am still reeling from it)

So yea, if you are interested in my book, let me know and I can send you the instagram link where you can keep upto date with it. The book will be going as an eBook first, if it does well, I will then publish it.

I have just drunk an amazing bottle of wine called Narat Zitz Rogg, it was a birthday present for Dan, but I cannot seem to find it anywhere – if you have seen it on your travels, please let me know as I am worried I will drink the rest of the bottle tonight and leave none for Dan. Talking of wine, if you are a fan of rose but don’t like it too sweet, you need to get yourself a bottle of Mirabeau. Oh my god. It is absoloutley fantastic. I heard about the wine through a lady I follow on insta called (Ultimategirlgang – go follow her, amazing) also (go follow blissfully_winging_it – also amazing) anyway, so yes, I came across Mirabeau wine because of Liv. It is a dry rose (didn’t even know you could get dry rose) but so refreshing and delicious. It is the perfect wine for a garden party/BBQ/all night drinking because it is so light, so you never feel full of wine or bloated.

Please hit me with your 5* suncreams please, ambre solaire is brining my two up and only has 3*’s which is crap!!

 

Sorry for the long rant, I hope you are all ok. I won’t leave it so long next time, I promise xx

Suns Out, Suns Out..

Today has been a strange one to say the least, Kellan has been at school and I’ve been at home with Grayson. We played outside, then he wanted to come inside and watch Hop!, then back outside, then inside.. you can see the pattern here?

Grayson has been a bit testing over the last couple of weeks, temper tantrums mixed with tiredness has just been a bit too much for me. I am trying to try new discipline techniques, we are getting there, slowly but surely.

So anyway, I had dentist today. I don’t like the dentist, it is a really big fear of mine. I stupidly decided to book a check up with the kids. To be honest, I tried to be a lot calmer for their sake as they love the dentist. Appointment was at 16:15, I am literally sweating out, majorly. It’s ridiculous. The receptionist’s were just staring at my two lunatics running around the hot waiting room, there’s nothing for them to play with so they were amusing themselves, and tbh, I was so nervous, I didn’t have the energy to rein them in.

Now, I told both boys that mummy was very scared of the dentist and I needed them to try their hardest to be good for mummy and if they could hold my hand.

16:35 arrives, and we were called through. Kellan threw me under the bus and put me forward first, but my little mate G run to the dentist chair and got comfortable. Next was my turn, G was insistent that he was sitting on my lap, the poor dentist was trying to check my teeth with Grayson fidgeting and trying to climb up and down off of my lap. After five minutes the dentist told me I needed a filling and deep clean but he will re-book me in. It just went downhill from there, kids were trying to run out the door while I was talking to the dentist, I then tried to pay and my card got declined twice. My face was melting, I am pretty sure I had sweat patches down to my hips! The receptionist wasn’t very sympathetic while I am trying to think what account I needed to pay out of, while trying to watch what the boys were doing. I then asked if I could rebook my appointment and she made it quite clear that I should probably call back once I am at home, without the kids. So I replied “of course, I will call you once I have taken my Demon children home” and walked out.

I was pissed off, hot, freaking out about my filling and tbh, I just wanted to get home to a big glass of wine.

Kids are now a bed, Dan is watching a film and I’m, well, Blogging.

I am enjoying this sunshine though, I don’t want it to ever leave!

Thank God it’s Friday tomorrow, hope you are all ok,

A x

Half Term Feels..

Can’t believe my little monkeys are back at school next week – once again half term has gone too quick.

They have drove me mad, as they do, but I do love having them home and not having to do the horrid school run!

One of my lovely friends gave birth yesterday to baby number two, it made me flash back to when Grayson joined our family. I remember not knowing how to feel, i felt guilt, emotion, love and I was overwhelmed. Kellan had stayed with my mum and dad the night before, I was up at 5:30 and at the hospital for 7:30am ready to wait for my time to go down for my second section. I was told at 8am that we were going down at 9am.

My mum and dad had jumped on a bus to go into chelmsford town to wait for the news whether we had another boy or a little girl, they were then going to buy some clothes with Kellan.  After being sick most of the morning, early afternoon after having Grayson my mum and dad arrived at 1pm with Kellan. Not going to lie, I was so nervous. Kellan knew there was a baby in my tummy, but didn’t quite understand. He was only 20 months.

I sat in bed, with Grayson in my arms, i debated leaving him in his little bedside crib but thought it was a better option to be holding him. Kellan came in with mum and dad and instantly pulled away from me, he wasn’t interested in me and definitely wasn’t interested in his new baby brother. I felt my heart break inside, i just wanted to scoop Kellan up and hold him tight. My dad took Grayson while mum still held onto Kellan, he then off of his own back went in for a kiss, it was the most quickest little kiss ever. After about half hour mum and dad took him home while i spent quiet time with Grayson. We had to stay in hospital for a night because of the section.

When I was allowed home, I was so excited as i had missed Kellan so much. I thought when I got home he would of came up and cuddled me, no, how wrong was I.

It honestly took about a week for him to come over to me, he just ignored Grayson completely, that lasted for about 3-4 days. I remember it being such a hard time for us all, adjusting from a family of three to four, and not forgetting how young Kellan still was.

Now looking at them, they are the best of friends. Still fight for mummy’s attention, but understand that they have to share mummy.

That all feels like such a long time ago, it just fly’s. Really do enjoy every minute.

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Hope you are all ok, Love A xx

Sunday Feels..

Good Evening My Lovelies,

How did your little cherubs cope with clocks going forward? Our two were up at 6:30 (5:30 in pre-going forward time) which was nice… Not. Not going to lie, think we both thought they may of slept a bit better seeing as they were on the go yesterday from the moment they woke up till the time they went to bed.

So, myself and Dan have now got healthcare insurance with Vitality, we were umming and ahhing for a bit about it, but like anything, the salesman sold it to us. Now, as a bonus for getting off my arse and exercising, I earn reward points for me, Kellan and Grayson (Dan is on his own for some reason), anyway so I do around 8,000-11,000 steps a day anyway so it’s nice that I now get rewards for it! One of the rewards are free cinema tickets, so on Saturday I used our reward codes and bought three tickets, and one for Dan. The sweets we bought for the cinema cost us more than the cinema trip. Mental, but so worth it. We took the boys to see Peter Rabbit, Kellan is really into it at the moment. Now, Kellan has been to the cinema before, Grayson hasn’t – wasn’t quite sure what to expect with G If i’m being honest. We sat in our seats, and the adverts had started rolling. Dan went to get the treats when all of a sudden Grayson started sobbing and telling me he wanted to go home. After calming him down and snuggling with him he was ok, still not sure, but ok. I think it was the loudness that upset him.

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Apart from that, it was a good trip. The film was really good as well, I will be honest, there were a couple of scenes that I thought were a bit much for a kids film, but then again, it’s life, unfortunately, it happens. Me and Dan did give each other the look a few times, especially when they mentioned rabbit pie.

From there the kids were dropped off to our friends who had offered to look after them (life savers, really don’t know what I would do without them) while we went out for my mum’s birthday. She wanted to do something different so we went to a place called Clue HQ in Brentwood for an escape room. To be honest I was a little dubious about it, not quite sure what to expect but it was a lot of fun and a good laugh. Lots of clues and problem solving, we struggled at times but got there in the end. We had 2 minutes remaining when we finally got out! If you can go, then do, it’s great team building and also just a great few hours out, it really was fun. I don’t want to say too much and spoil it!! After escaping and having a quick photo, we then went Zizzi’s for dinner.

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Today we had a well needed chill day, kids have played, had their tablets, watched films. Dan has been working most of the day, I sorted the toy room and worked through the washing. I was meant to be going for afternoon tea with my neice but I haven’t been very well and was worried about sitting on a train for two hours, really gutted about that as it is a fab afternoon tea, it was beauty and the beast themed at Kensington Hotel (will have to make it up to her)

Kids were very hyped before bed so decided to give them a nice calm bath with some added Lavender Oil from Little Aureila (if your kids have sensitive skin or trouble sleeping, go over and have a look, their stuff is amazing. & no, this is not an ad, just supporting a small business), just as I was about to get them out the bath, Grayson stood up and quite cheerily declared he had pooed in the bath. Kellan’s face was a picture, I have never seen that boy jump out of the bath as quick as he did tonight. Honestly. Shit sorted, bath disinfected and Daddy Dan on PJ duty we were good to go. I didn’t think they were going to give in and settle as they were giggling and talking about the poo (as they do) but they are snoring away and have been since 7:30. Bonus.

I hope you are all ok, and are enjoying the last of the weekend. I’m now on countdown mode, four more days and the kids break up for two weeks. Woohoo.

 

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